Not up enough to be a hipster,
I’m too clean to be a crust,
The screamo kids say I’m a whisper,
Only screaming if I must.
The nice girls say I’m too mean,
The black girls say I’m too white,
The mean girls say I’m just too nice,
The wrong girls say I’m just right.
The punkers say I’m complacent,
I’m too angry to be a romantic,
Landlord says I can’t even pay rent,
These people are arguing semantics,
And my energy is straight up spent.
The police call me a repeat offender,
The addicts call me an abuser,
The straight edge kids call me a binger,
And the cool kids call me loser.
The army says that I’m too small,
Senators call me a terrorist,
Faculty says I’m too loud in the halls,
ROTC keeps calling me “miss.”
The reporters say I’m a statistic,
The doctor says that I’m dying,
TV calls me a demographic,
Polygraph just says I’m lying.
Preachers call me sadistic,
The censors all call me obscene,
All this shit just gives me a kick,
Because stoner apathist is my scene.